I'm So Ready

I've been saying for awhile that theres some blogs I want to get written before a certain friend leaves on his mission, but recently I have just found myself to be so busy with work or friends or family. I just don't really have any 'me' time going on. I haven't played guitar in ages. Ok that's a lie I did today, but I haven't played just for the sake of playing. And I haven't written a thing either. I think that sometimes we can often get to a point where our minds can't see past the end of our nose. I don't really care for those times. What's worse is that I know I'm being productive, but I really don't feel as though I am.

I don't really know where I'm going with this, but at the same time I kind of do because I'm thinking it out in my head before I type it. I've probably got a good paragraph pre-revision in my head, ahead of my typing. Anyway, point is, I basically feel that I'm spending all my time working. Which is understandable when I'm working 9 hour shifts 5 days a week. And when I'm not working I'm getting calls about work or doing something for work. Seriously, how ever did my life get sucked into Coldstone Creamery? Like, it's easy for me to get sucked into things I'm passionate about. But Coldstone? Really? Definitely not passionate about that one.

So really, the point isn't about the work, but about balancing life and work. I spend quite a bit of time with my friends and working, but not enough time with my family and working on my personal projects. I feel my life is lacking because of it. I did take my dog for a walk downtown 2 nights ago with a friend. I feel like I've been neglecting him. But I hardly see my family. I'm rarely home in time for dinner. Thank goodness vacation is coming up. All things need balance. And I haven't worked on my music, or my clothing company. It's taking a toll.

So what do we do when our lives are unbalanced? Many people don't notice. I do. And I think the world around us (believe in what you will it doesn't matter to me) wants to try and balance that for us, because it knows it is creating something positive. I like to think that that has just happened to me. I mean, last weekend I had an absolutely fantastic weekend with friends in SLC, but after returning home I felt quite depressed. Well, not really depressed, but like I was missing somethings. I don't really know what things, just things. Feelings. Happiness. I don't know if I can ever be so happy as when I am at a show, for a musician I just love. Sometimes I forget that feeling. Then I feel it again and the world is great and new. I think my regular life has lost that flare. I just don't feel it. That's why being back from SLC was such a huge bummer. I felt the flare and realized it wasn't here for once.

But like I said, my world tries to even itself out. How nicely my life is falling back into place. There's an amazing concert a week from tonight in SLC. I will be there. With my SLC friends (minus one), and my Boise friends. Kara and I finally get to see The Maine TOGETHER! I know what makes me happy, and I can't keep forgetting it. If it wasn't for this show I think I would go insane.

I won't be surprised when this doesn't make sense to anyone besides myself, but oh well it doesn't matter. The point is, if you love something and are living without it, you can find a way to get it back. If it's truly yours, the world will give it to you.

I love being home in Boise. I love being ready for everything to happen.